Do therapists ever get nervous in the session

My first visit to the psychologist

Last update: October 22, 2018

I never thought that I would ever have to go to a psychologist. In addition, I never really got into the work of psychologists, or never thought about what therapy could do for me. But one day everything changed. I got a feeling that something was wrong with me and I couldn't explain why.

I felt less motivated. And I no longer had the same joy in things that I once enjoyed. I found it harder and harder to get out of bed and out of the house, although I felt better every time I was out. I felt like I wanted to but couldn't. It was a strange feeling, and it made me wonder if there was something wrong with my sanity.

Time passed and nothing seemed to change or improve. Finally, I took up all my courage to go to a psychologist. I didn't know what to expect, what to say, or how to start when I got to his office. I was very nervous and reluctant. Now that I look back on the results, I can say that it was definitely worth it. It was also different from what I expected.

"Everyone speaks of the mind without hesitation, but they are perplexed when you ask them to define it"

B. F. Skinner

A psychologist won't tell you what you want to hear, they will tell you the truth even if it hurts

When I first went to my psychologist he started asking me why I decided to seek help. It scared me that I couldn't explain it. As I mentioned earlier, I just felt bad. I couldn't find reasons or words to make me feel unwell. And contrary to what I expected, talking to him was actually very easy.

He was able to help me put my problem into words. Also, he didn't make me feel alone or helpless, nor did he just tell me what I wanted to hear. He just taught me how to analyze what wasn't going well and how to work on it. And he helped me to be aware of my mistakes, but also of my potential.

“Your way of life is determined not so much by what life brings you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much of what is happening to you as of the way your mind sees what is happening. "

Khalil Gibran

But we didn't just talk. From the beginning we agreed that we had a common goal. With this, we wanted to help me move beyond the feelings of discomfort that led me to make an appointment. This is perhaps the hardest part of therapy. You are not a passive being receiving a magical solution to your problems. Instead, you realize that your problems can change, that they can grow, or that they can go away. It all depends on how you perceive them and what you do about them, directly or indirectly.

That's when you realize that there are no magic spells. Change is difficult. Sometimes it is harder to change than to suffer from the problem that brought you to the psychologist. During the process, your idea of ​​who you are could change, and that can be scary. But the goal is not to feel good in the short term. You are working on a change that will make you feel good in the long run.

"The job of psychology is to give us a completely different idea of ​​the things that we know best."

Paul Valery

A good psychologist will help you get rid of guilt. But it will also make you take responsibility for your feelings

As soon as you have started therapy and implemented changes, the process is not entirely without hurdles. Since I was aware of my problems, I have often tried to label them. These labels didn't always match what my psychologist had told me.

This made me trust him less because I believed that nobody knows me better than myself. Later I understood and came to appreciate the knowledge of mental sources and gears as my psychologist sees them. It was something very simple, but at first I didn't see it. As it turns out, we can all be masters of self-deception.

Self-deception leads us to be too cruel or too good of ourselves. It makes it impossible for us to see our own reality clearly. So often that we wallow in guilt for how we feel or who we are. And that's simply because we're not doing well.

But the therapy is like a mirror. It shows you that you see yourself exactly as you are, and not as you wish, or how you want to blame yourself for existence. During my first session with the psychologist, he helped me free myself from the guilt I had for not achieving my goals. My guilt for not using all of my energy to achieve my goals. In this sense He helped me take responsibility for the feelings that arose from guilt.

For all these reasons, my first visit to the psychologist was worth it. Now I am stronger, I have more resources, and my view of how I understand the world is more balanced. Now I know that I am not perfect. In fact, I've developed a certain affection for the mistakes that previously caused me so much frustration. I can face life and I can fail. None of this makes me weak. It increases my motivation to keep growing.

I definitely still have fears, but they no longer creep into my thoughts and paralyze me. My fears don't control me because I have the support to untie the knots that once held me as a prisoner.

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